The only question you need to ask
These steps are your roadmap.
There’s one question I return to over and over:
How do I want to feel?
Most often I personally gear towards things like:
ease, comfort, freedom, living in purpose, joy.
Identifying words is lovely, but the real magic happens when clarifying for yourself what actions lead you to these states.
My biggest life change in adulthood was leaving New York City and moving to the mountains. I wasn’t afraid to start over because I knew that the feelings I wanted to feel on a daily basis were more easily accessible if I left the city.
(For example, being in nature everyday).
My move didn’t fix everything. I still felt lonely and uncertain (hello pandemmy!) But it answered something my heart was asking me for, and in doing so was a catalyst to welcome more amazing things into my life.
Let me break it down…
Where to begin?
Identify your desired emotional state: First, think about how you want to feel in general. Do you want to feel more energized, calm, or creative? Once you have an idea, you can narrow it down to a more specific emotion. For example, if you want to feel more energetic, you might specifically focus on feeling invigorated or motivated.
Consider past experiences: Think about times in the past when you felt the way you want to feel. What were you doing? What was happening in your life? Make a list of the activities, situations, and people that were associated with those positive emotions.
Identify commonalities: Look for commonalities among the experiences you listed. What are the recurring activities or situations that seem to lead to your desired emotional state? These are the actions that you can start to focus on incorporating more into your life.
Experiment and refine: Once you have identified some potential actions, start to experiment with incorporating them into your life. See how they make you feel. Be mindful of your emotions throughout the day and see if you can identify any patterns between your actions and your feelings. This will help you to refine your list of actions and identify the ones that are most effective for you.
Keep in mind…
Realistic: Don't try to change everything at once. Start by focusing on incorporating a few small actions into your life.
Patience: It takes time to develop new habits and change the way you feel. Don't get discouraged if you don't see results immediately! Good things take time.
Track: Keep a journal, use your notes app, or a feelings tracker app to track your progress. This can help you to identify patterns and stay motivated to continue your efforts.
It doesn’t have to be a huge TO DO. You can start by making small lists and identifying the life stuff that is actually quite life giving. Sometimes naming it plainly can imbue a newfound sense of gratitude.
Your time is precious. Use it in ways that excite you!
This is the type of work I love diving into with my one-on-one coaching clients. If you’ve been curious about working together, head to my website for more information, and don’t hesitate to shoot me a message.
Recommendation Roundup . . .
This week’s favorites!
DRINK | The internet’s Sleepy Girl Mocktail
2 oz (or so) of Tart Cherry Juice
Seltzer of your choice
Squeeze of lime
Spoon of Magnesium power (or tablet)
I recommend using a large glass so that you can dilute with seltzer and make it bubbly. Garnish with lime, or get wild an add mint or herb of choice.
EAT | Saucy Peanut Ginger Chicken Meatball Bowls
I recently started following Jenn Eats Good (thank you algorithm!) in my quest for recipes and inspiration for easy + healthy meal prep. I love that she provides shopping trips with several meal ideas, for those of us looking to save TIME and still make ourselves amazing lunches + dinners.
LISTEN | If Books Could Kill
Michel Hobbes and Peter Shamsheri discuss popular self-helpy airport bestsellers. Certain wellness influencers have recommended Rich Dad Poor Dad as financial literacy, so I particularly enjoyed this episode where they READ the book. (get it?)
WATCH | The Regime on HBO
Kate Winslet stars in this show as the Chancellor of an unnamed Central European nation that is unraveling behind the palace walls. In addition to witty writing and great performances, A+ for costume design and art direction.
WEAR | Time Off Sneaker
Sam made fun of me for buying Dr. Scholl’s shoes, but as a woman of a certian age, I’m highly invested in having happy feet. I’ve had these for several months and am very happy with them.
As always, thank you for reading!
Word of mouth is very powerful for the type of work I do. It would mean so much to me if you shared this newsletter and my IG with a friend who you think it might resonate with.
xo Caitlin